


“Sluts unite” group chat

by a_perverted_squid



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: All of them are over 21, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Human, Crack Fic, Group chat, Multi, Students, Teacher Hank Anderson, everyone is happy, slightly nsfw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-16 01:07:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18681031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_perverted_squid/pseuds/a_perverted_squid
Summary: Twink(ies): Is anybody up? I need help with homeworkSixty: why don’t you ask professor Anderson about it ;)Twink(ies): For the last time, I did not suck his dick, I went to his cabinet to help him out with somethingGlory hole: yeah to help his blow his loadTwink(ies): Oh look who’s talkingSixty: yeah you better shut up we know what you did with NinesGlory hole: I have no idea what you’re talking about





	“Sluts unite” group chat

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Finnijer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Finnijer/gifts).



> Nicknames:
> 
> Twink(ies) - Connor  
> Sixty - RK800-60  
> Nine - RK900  
> Glory hole - Gavin  
> Chris is that a weed - Chris  
> T pose - Tina
> 
> Hope you enjoy this very silly fic!

Sunday

Twink(ies): Is anybody up? I need help with homework 

Sixty: why don’t you ask professor Anderson about it ;) 

Twink(ies): For the last time, I did not suck his dick, I went to his cabinet to help him out with something 

Glory hole: yeah to help his blow his load

Twink(ies): Oh look who’s talking 

Sixty: yeah you better shut up we know what you did with Nines

Glory hole: I have no idea what you’re talking about 

Sixty: do you need a reminder? it kinda went like “oh yes, yes, deeper daddy, make me your slut!”

T pose: to be fair the whole campus heard you fuck 

Glory hole: Tina how dare you

T pose: what? It’s true

Glory hole: not that, you took his side, aren’t we supposed to be best friends?

T pose: Gav shut up

Glory hole: fine Chris is my new best friend now

Chris is that a weed: I’d rather die

Glory hole: :o

Sixty: same face you were making while sucking his dick

Nine: you are so immature 

Sixty: I don’t have an iPhone somebody put that bottom looking emoji

T pose: 🥴

Sixty: bless you for that

Twink(ies): are you done? I seriously need help

Sixty: why don’t you go and ask Nine but don’t forget to knock otherwise you might see more than you bargained for

Nine: Reed’s not here so shut up

Glory hole: just say the words and I’ll be there in five

T pose: wow horny much?

Glory hole: that’s my middle name

Chris is that a weed: stop 

Glory hole: make me

Sixty: somebody feed this man child some cock so he finally shuts up

Glory hole: I could say the same for you

Sixty: what

Glory hole: that’s right baby I know what you and Allen did

Sixty: what are you talking about 

Glory hole: stop playing dumb we all know the two of you screw all the time

T pose: doesn’t he have a girlfriend?

Chris is that a weed: yeah he does what’s her name again

Glory hole: doesn’t matter because our boy Sixty is the one milking

Sixty: shut up

Glory hole: his

Sixty: stop

Glory hole: HE IS THE ONE MILKING THAT DICK

Nine: really? 

Twink(ies): is that true?

Chris is that a weed: yeah now I’m curious too

T pose: spill the tea 

Sixty: fuck you all

Glory hole: love you too 

T pose: so?

Sixty: fine for fuck sake

Nine: come on what happened 

Sixty: we were on a party recently, we got drunk and made out, I gave him my number 

Chris is that a weed: and?

Sixty: and we’ve been hooking up ever since

Nine: but he has a girlfriend

Sixty: trust me you wouldn’t care if you saw how big his dick is

Chris is that a weed: keep the details to yourself 

T pose: shut up I want to know

Chris is that a weed: aren’t you a lesbian?

T pose: your point? I may be gay but I’m also curious 

Twink(ies): good point

Sixty: 10 inches is all I’m saying 

Glory hole: damn Nine’s is like 9

Sixty: whaaaat

Nine: shut up Reed

Sixty: why didn’t you tell us you had a monster cock

Nine: why does it matter 

Sixty: because we’re triplets and we’re supposed to have sam dicks

Twink(ies): where did you get that idea? Also I’m 8 inches

Sixty: ...

Glory hole: weird flex

T pose: family bonding at its finest

Chris is that a weed: lowkey disturbed

Nine: what’s wrong 

Sixty: why do both of you have such big dicks

Nine: how big is yours?

Sixty: shut up

Twink(ies): pm me

Nine: yeah do that

Glory hole: if it’s 5 inches I’ll laugh

T pose: I’ve seen yours you have a tiny dick

Glory hole: I do not

Nine: yes you do

Chris is that a weed: why do you know how big his dick is

T pose: that’s a long story

Twink(ies): don’t tell me you hooked up with Gavin

T pose: no, he sent me a snap of his dick by accident 

Glory hole: tragic moment

T pose: it truly is tragic 

Glory hole: oh fuck you

Chris is that a weed: I’m speechless

Twink(ies): let’s stop talking about Gavin’s penis please 

Glory hole: yeah exactly so how big is Anderson’s dick

Twink(ies): how should I know, I told you nothing happened between us

Nine: right right 

Chris is that a weed: look man even if you did something we won’t judge

Twink(ies): but I didn’t 

T pose: and we believe you

Sixty: speak for yourself 

Nine: you’re stressing him out

Chris is that a weed: okay we’ll stop

Twink(ies): thank you

Sixty: you know what

Twink(ies): what

Sixty: I bet you could do a split on his dick

Twink(ies): goodbye 

Sixty: oh come on

Nine: shut it 

T pose: can you do a split in general 

Sixty: he can, that’s his talent 

Glory hole: what’s yours

Sixty: no gag reflex 

Glory hole: you’re my hero

T pose: alright and what’s Nine’s?

Glory hole: he fucks

T pose: yeah I got that

Glory hole: no you don’t understand, he, fucks

T pose: I still don’t get it

Chris is that a weed: yeah what the hell is that supposed to mean

Sixty: he probably lasts for very long and recovers fast after he cums

Glory hole: bingo

T pose: impressive 

Chris is that a weed: all of them are like sex machines 

Nine: please stop

Sixty: no let him talk, flatter me some more

Twink(ies): why am I friends with you again

Sixty: because we’re cool?

Nine: because we live under the same roof?

Glory hole: because you love us?

Twink(ies): no, no and no, this is the last time, can anybody help me with homework?

T pose: I will, I will, pm me

Twink(ies): thank you

Monday

Sixty: morning sluts, I’ll be late for class so tell Anderson I fell asleep or something 

T pose: alright but why are you really late???

Sixty: that’s a secret 

Glory hole: I saw him entering a bathroom stall with Allen again, bet he got cum in his eye or something 

Sixty: I did not

Glory hole: did he cum on your shirt?

Sixty: no 

Glory hole: your pants?

Sixty: no

T pose: alright what happened then

Sixty: it’s embarrassing 

Nine: I’ll have to mute you all if you don’t shut up right now

Sixty: I got a condom stuck up my ass

Nine: never mind I’m interested 

T pose: good god

Glory hole: holy fuck is it still stuck inside you?

Sixty: of course not we took it out

Twink(ies): I mean at least you’re using protection so good job

Chris is that a weed: what the hell did I just walk into 

T pose: morning Chris

Chris is that a weed: hi

Sixty: anyway the condom is out but my ass is sore as fuck

Glory hole: was it that bad

Sixty: he has a big cock he pushed it so far up he basically had to fist me to get it out

T pose: I’m going to hell just for reading this 

Sixty: see you there I guess 

Twink(ies): alright alright quiet down now, I’ll tell the professor you’ll be late and that’s it

Sixty: tnx bro

Glory hole: I’m bored

T pose: we’ve been here for less than three minutes 

Glory hole: your point?

T pose: I’m so done with you

Chris is that a weed: pay attention to class you two

T pose: never

Nine: Chris is right, this might he important 

Glory hole: m i g h t

T pose: might 

Glory hole: MIGHT

T pose: мigнт

Nine: are you two 2 or 21 I can not tell

Glory hole: who cares just look how Con looks at Anderson 

T pose: what do you think he’s thinking about 

Glory hole: being dicked down

Chris is that a weed: he’s a softie

Glory hole: probably gets a boner when he thinks about holding hands

Nine: probably the funniest thing you’ve said all your life

Glory hole: is it because I’m right or

Nine: you’re definitely right 

T pose: I bet he’s actually super kinky

Nine: what do you mean by that

T pose: he probably has a weird kinks like ovipositon 

Nine: what is that

Glory hole: you don’t want to know

Chris is that a weed: do you think he’s into feet

T pose: definitely 

Nine: feet fetish isn’t that odd

Sixty: can’t believe you’re into feet

Nine: where did you just come from

Sixty: oh I heard ovipositon so

Glory hole: well that’s odd

Nine: Reed you’re into tentacles and knotting please 

Chris is that a weed: god all of you are so kinky

T pose: okay but what are your three dirtiest kinks?

Nine: feet, edging, asphyxiation

Sixty: ovipositon, cum inflation, piss

Glory hole: knotting, breeding, pet play

T pose: nipple play, overstimulation, hands

Chris is that a weed: and I thought using a gag was too spicy for me

Sixty: you’re so pure please never change 

Twink(ies): stop texting and pay attention to the lecture 

Sixty: sure thing baby slut

Glory hole: he does seem like a sugar baby doesn’t he?

Twink(ies): please stop talking 

Sixty: alright alright 

Glory hole: why didn’t we skip class, this shit’s boring as fuck

T pose: because we’re good kiddos 

Glory hole: totally we suck dick and eat ass 

Chris is that a weed: speak for yourself 

Glory hole: let’s play smash or pass I want to be smashed by Niles Stern just about now

Nine: that’s not how the game works but pm me anyway

T pose: if you two get up to go fuck now I’ll lose my last brain cell 

Sixty: I dare you to do it I double dare you

Chris is that a weed: look at them go, no shame, no worries

T pose: No words.

Twink(ies): did they seriously go out to fuck, they could’ve waited fifteen more minutes 

T pose: eh can’t wait for it to end

Twink(ies): I think today’s lecture is interesting 

Chris is that a weed: you sound so professional when you talk like that

Twink(ies): my apologies, the clazz today iz hella lit fam, hella lit

Chris is that a weed: Tina stop laughing so damn hard the whole Detroit can hear you

T pose: sorry sorry 

Sixty: god I’m so bored

T pose: wanna hear a story

Sixty: what kind

T pose: my first hook up story

Sixty: hell yes

T pose: alright so this happened a while ago, I was around 18 I think and I went to a birthday party, you know Markus right?

Sixty: of course 

T pose: yeah so I’m friends with his bestie North and he invited me to come over because North asked if I could come

Sixty: didn’t know you were friends with her

T pose: yea, so basically we come there and it’s fun, you know his dad is super rich so of course there’s alcohol and whatnot and then comes Gavin’s half brother Elijah with this gorgeous girl and I’m immensely interested, like she was the most stunning girl ever, so I ask North if they’re dating and she tells me no, the girl’s called Chloe and she’s his cousin 

Chris is that a weed: oh yea I’ve met her once 

T pose: she’s super sweet 

Chris is that a weed: true

T pose: anyway back to the story, I go over to her, I had no idea if she was interested in girls or not but I start flirting with her and she tells me she’s bi and flirts back, she kinda starts getting physical at that point, she’s leaning on me, occasionally touching my hair and what not

Sixty: damn 

T pose: also neither of us were drunk, we shared a beer together but we weren’t even slightly tipsy

Sixty: even if you were drunk out of your minds I wouldn’t judge you, I fucked so many times while being drunk or high or drunk and high so

T pose: wow, anyway she suddenly grabs my hand and drags me to some room, it’s not that big but she clearly doesn’t care since she’s now pressed against me and kissing me like crazy, at that point in time I thought I was a complete dom and nothing else but she was my switch awakening

Sixty: I’ll always be sub and no man can change that

T pose: I was ready to fuck her then and there but she just smirks at me and tells me to get on my knees, I obviously listen and she lifts her dress and lowers her underwear, she pulls my hair and tells me to stop her if I get uncomfortable or whatever but I’m over there dying to eat her out so I just get to work, she was very loud and bossy and I just went along with it, it was amazing, once she was done she smiled at me and told me it’s time to “reward me for being such a good girl”

Chris is that a weed: woah I would’ve never guessed she’s bossy

T pose: she bent me over some old antique table and holy shit, the things she can do with her mouth and fingers, never expected to enjoy anal that much but whatever, we finally finish and apparently it’s been like two hours since we’ve started and Elijah is looking for her because they have to get back home since she’s not from Detroit and has to go back the next day, we say our goodbyes and haven’t seen her since then

Sixty: wonderful story, sounds like my every other Friday 

Chris is that a weed: how can you be so horny

Sixty: that’s my secret Chris, I’m always horny

Twink(ies): okay that is a pretty interesting story

T pose: thank you

Glory hole: I left my jacket in class can somebody take it

T pose: look who it is

Chris is that a weed: no problem man

Sixty: did you get your daily dose of cummies?

Twink(ies): all of you are so nasty

Sixty: thank you

Twink(ies): anyway don’t wait for me I’ll stay over to help Hank

Sixty: oooooooo Hank~ ;)

Twink(ies): shut up 

Nine: alright see you later

T pose: bye Con 

Chris is that a weed: see ya later

Tuesday 

Sixty: CONNOR POPPED HIS CHERRY 

Nine: congratulations?

T pose: our baby grew up

Glory hole: now you can finally tell me how big is Anderson’s dick

Twink(ies): I knew I couldn’t trust you

Sixty: :p

T pose: so how did it go? was it painful? tell us all about it

Twink(ies): do I have to?

Nine: no

Glory hole: absolutely 

Sixty: want me to share a story first? doesn’t matter because I’m telling you anyway so one time like last year I met up with this one dude to fuck but his roommate came back early so the two of us went to fuck in his car that was parked in the garage, he brought the biggest strap I’ve ever seen in my life and sucked my dick like nobody ever could, I still think about him from time to time and his massive strap, wonder if he’d be still down to fuck

T pose: I’ll add this to my collection of “Stern’s sex stories” or “SSS” for short

Sixty: only if you read the SSS as ass ass ass

T pose: deal

Sixty: anyway back to you Con

Twink(ies): alright alright 

Nine: despite what they say, you don’t have to share anything if you’re uncomfortable or shy

Twink(ies): it’s alright, don’t worry, he asked me to come to his cabinet again and we talked, nothing too special, when he told me he needed to talk to me about something

T pose: go on

Twink(ies): he said he noticed the way I look at him and that he couldn’t help but to think of me as well, he was very polite about it and kept asking if I was uncomfortable, the sex wasn’t planned it just kinda happened, I started kissing him and it just went from there, he kept asking if I was sure and if I was okay, all in all a very nice experience 

Nine: that’s nice to hear

Glory hole: can’t believe I’m saying this but I’m happy for you man

Twink(ies): yeah and I trust you all not to talk about this to anybody else, the relationship between the two of us will stay strictly professional for now

Sixty: no worries 

Chris is that a weed: don’t worry we won’t cause you trouble

Twink(ies): thank you so much 

Sixty: no need

T pose: yeah exactly any sane person would respect your decision to keep this a secret 

Nine: just take care and stay safe

Glory hole: yeah all what they said plus enjoy the dick also I have a question 

Twink(ies): yeah?

Glory hole: so how big is he

Twink(ies): big and thick if you really have to know

Glory hole: I knew it

Twink(ies): I must admit it is much better than any sex toy ever

Nine: well that’s just pure logic 

Glory hole: wait you have sex toys?

Twink(ies): I do 

Glory hole: damn and you never bothered to show me?

Twink(ies): and why would I do that?

Glory hole: um maybe recommend me what’s good?????

T pose: you have more than enough toys and a whole boyfriend to mess around with so

Nine: he’s greedy 

Twink(ies): what else is new

Glory hole: greed rhymes with Reed baby ;)

Sixty: does it??

Nine: and Niles rhymes with please stop being horny in the group chat

Glory hole: no it doesn’t 

Chris is that a weed: sorry to ruin whatever the hell is going on at the moment but I need some help with a project I was assigned so if anybody could help out I’d appreciate it

T pose: I can come over if you have time now, I’ve got nothing better to do so

Chris is that a weed: thank you T 

T pose: no prob, see you in around 20 minutes 

Sixty: oh yeah btw did we have homework or can I go out tonight and get lucky

Nine: no homework you’re free to go slut around 

Sixty: fuck yes

Nine: going out with Allen again?

Sixty: yes we’re getting dinner and then going to his place after

Twink(ies): oh so you’re going on a date

Sixty: that’s not a date

Nine: sounds like a date to me

Glory hole: that is definitely a date

Sixty: it’s not it’s just the two of us spending time together and then fucking

Glory hole: you like him don’t you?

Sixty: of course not I mean he is handsome and funny and caring and sweet and he holds my hand and makes sure I’m okay each time we finish having sex not to mention he always makes sure I get home safely and oh god I do like him

Nine: knew it

Sixty: what do I do?

Glory hole: I don’t know he probably likes you too based on everything 

Sixty: I’ve never been interested in a person for their personality before what the hell is this

Twink(ies): it’s called love 

Glory hole: you’ll be fine he probably feels the same way about you 

Sixty: but what if he doesn’t 

Twink(ies): only one way to find out

Sixty: I don’t like that idea

Glory hole: come on man don’t be a bitch

Sixty: I don’t want to get hurt, I’d rather stay quiet and suck his dick than lose him over my dumb feelings

Twink(ies): alright this is getting too deep I’m coming to your room we need to talk

Sixty: don’t 

Twink(ies): too late open the door

Sixty: fine

Glory hole: it’s just the two of us now ;)

Nine: this is still the group chat so please keep your cock in your pants

Glory hole: you’re no fun

Nine: I suppose so

Glory hole: I’m just joking, you’re great

Nine: thank you

Glory hole: my pleasure as always 

Nine: look at you being all nice and what not

Glory hole: something wrong with that ;)

Nine: of course not, I just can’t stop thinking about how slutty you actually are

Glory hole: how about I show you instead 

T pose: you’re still in the gc so please go fuck somewhere else

Nine: I apologize 

Glory hole: Tina noooooo I was so close to maybe sucking dick today

T pose: lol bye

Glory hole: curse you 

T pose: yeah yeah

Nine: if you’re that desperate you should take me out on a date

Glory hole: why didn’t you say so earlier?

Nine: I wanted to see how long it’d take you to ask me out on a proper date

Glory hole: well shit 

Nine: that’s alright I understand 

Glory hole: understand what?

Nine: you think with your penis and only use two of your brain cells 

T pose: burn

Glory hole: shut up T

T pose: only if you shut up first

Sixty: I’m done being emo over a dude time to be edgy again I’m gonna go suck some dick and get fingered byeee

Twink(ies): he cried a little and texted him if he’d like to hang out sometimes, in his words “would you like to go out but like only to hang out and I don’t know like you know”, he’s super smooth as you can see

Glory hole: god he’s even worse than me

Nine: I wouldn’t be bragging with that if I were you

Glory hole: :((((

T pose: top ten anime betrayals 

Twink(ies): I swear every person in this group chat is on drugs

Glory hole: I’d never 

T pose: yeah you’re right you probably smoke basil instead of weed tho

Glory hole: I’m not that dumb

Nine: hmn

Twink(ies): hhhmnnnnn

Glory hole: shut up 

Nine: fine fine

T pose: our job is to roast you what else are friends for

Glory hole: you’re right you useless lesbian

T pose: love you too Gav love you too

Glory hole: I still can’t believe Connor lost his v card 

Twink(ies): and why is that so odd?

Glory hole: well I’ve been living this slut life for a while now so

Twink(ies): I seriously don’t know how to respond to this one

T pose: it’s best to ignore him

Glory hole: :(((((

T pose: stop it

Glory hole: :p anyway gotta go walk my cat

T pose: pet Lilith for me please 

Twink(ies): you walk your cat?

Nine: I think I want to marry him

T pose: big mistake 

Glory hole: I’m your best happy accident 

Nine: yes you are

Wednesday 

Chris is that a weed: where’s everybody?

T pose: Chris sunshine the class starts at 9 today

Chris is that a weed: god damn it

T pose: It’s okay I’m almost ready so we can meet up and go for a walk, maybe get breakfast together 

Chris is that a weed: you’re a lifesaver 

T pose: thank you thank you

Sixty: how the hell did you fuck up that one

Nine: oh look who’s alive, where have you been all night

Sixty: I slept over at Allen’s 

Nine: you could’ve told us, Amanda asked where the hell you were

Sixty: shit what did you tell her

Twink(ies): you were at Tina’s studying if she asks

Sixty: thank you

Nine: no need

T pose: glad my existence helped out 

Sixty: yeah thank you too

Nine: so how was it

Sixty: it was nice

T pose: oh you know we need more than that

Sixty: well we didn’t fuck, we talked, finally asked him about the whole girlfriend thing and he said he’s in an opened relationship so he never cheated and the girl knew

Nine: is he bi or?

Sixty: he thought he was straight until we met which is flattering 

T pose: wow you made a man gay

Sixty: I’m a man of many talents

Twink(ies): alright but what about you two now

Sixty: I was honest and told him I’d like to have something more 

Nine: what about him?

Sixty: he said he likes me a lot and will actually think about it

T pose: is that good?

Sixty: it’s great, we have a date this Friday

T pose: that’s lovely 

Chris is that a weed: very nice I’m happy for you

Sixty: thank you all

Nine: Con and I will get going now, where should we pick you up?

Sixty: I’ll pm you his address 

T pose: I’ll be there in a minute Chris

Chris is that a weed: okay see you soon then

Twink(ies): see ya in class

Glory hole: holy fuck I overslept 

Glory hole: guys? you here?

Glory hole: I’ll be late can somebody pick me up??

Glory hole: helllloooooo

Glory hole: all of you are bastards just so you know

**Author's Note:**

> HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BIRTHDAY TWIN JEN ILYSM <3
> 
>  
> 
> in case you’re hungry for more shitposts follow me on twitter @apervertedsquid !!!


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